She Nubs Me, She Nubs Me Not
by Phoenix Reece
Summary: Based on the lastest HTF short, what happens when Petunia loses both her arms in an accident, and begins to warm up to a certain beaver while her boyfriend's away? Chapter two is live!
1. An Odd Circumstance

**Author's Note**

Well, by reading the title, any Good HTF fan will have guessed what's going on in this story. The first chapter is going to be basically "I Nub You" the latest HTF episode, though I'm going to switch it up a bit, and give it a bit more substance. Now for those of you who saw the episode and read some of my other stories, I'm only giving ONE hint about what's going to happen. Chunky IS in fact going to be playing a prominent role in this tale, as well as his relationship (Wink Wink Nudge Nudge)

But enough chitter-chatter, let's get down to the heartbreaking trag-,er I mean love story.

**She Nubs Me, She Nubs Me Not:**

**A "Funny Love" Story.**

Set the scene on a small house in Happy Tree Town, a bright day, mid-summer in fact. The front door swings open briskly and out strolls Petunia, on her way to pick up the mail. It was such a beautiful day she couldn't help but whistle and even began to skip down to her mailbox. She swung it open and pulled out the letters, quietly humming a familiar tune as she walked back up to her house to read the mail. Flipping through it, she found a little postcard from her boyfriend, Chunky the Koala. He was new around town, but they had gotten quite close over the half a year she knew him. He was off in Hawaii, it was his Uncle Disco Bear's idea, but was always keeping in touch. Her eyes scanned the card and she quietly read it aloud.

_Dear Petunia_

_It's hot as ever down here, but as you can guess Uncle Disco still thinks he's hotter. (_She giggled a little and kept reading). _It must sound crazy, but I'm actually learning to surf. A local convinced me to, a cute little raccoon girl. She looked a few years younger than me, but gosh she can surf. But, I can somewhat balance, so good news there. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know how we were doing, and to thank you again for taking care of Disco's Parakeet. Remember, if anyone asks, it's mine (His words exactly)._

_Love, Chunky._

Petunia turned the card over and quietly laughed at the picture on front. Chunky stood in the foreground, with a bathing suit and a surfboard in hand, and Disco, in the background was unsuccessfully flirting with a Hula Dancer. She was about to go back to sorting the mail when it hit her.

"Oh, the parakeet!" She hurried over to the cage and was relieved to find the little green bird was still okay. "I guess you need some food then." She squatted down and picked up the large bag of birdseed, and unclasped the cage to grab the bird's food dish, but the second she did, it flew out of the cage.

"OH! Come back here you, get back in the cage!" She jumped up and down trying to catch the bird, but it circled the room just out of her reach before it landed on the open windowsill across the room.

"Eek! Stay away from there birdie!" She said, leaping at the bird to catch it before it flew off. In an instant, she snatched it up right before it flew off. Feeling the bird in her hands, she let out a sigh of relief, right before the window unclasped, and snapped down on her elbows, severing them in one quick blow. Petunia shrieked in horror, stumbling backwards staring at the nubs of her arms as they gushed blood all over the floor. In her terrified stupor, she tripped over the seeds that had fallen to the ground as the bird escaped and smashed the back of her head on the end table that held the bird's cage. Suddenly, the room was silent, and Petunia lay there gushing blood from her arms, and now her head. It seemed like our story would end here.

But no, it gets much more exciting. Petunia, half expecting the inky blackness to engulf her, and to dream until she was revived, as it always had. And she was not wrong, she did dream in a deep darkness, but it was different. Normally she had dreamt of meadows, or drifting through the clouds, but this was no dream. Everything was painfully dark, darker than usual, and it was hot. Her body was wet with sweat and blood, and the earth rocked back and forth beneath her. Muffled voices could be heard, then she began to move quickly, then nothing but a constant beeping noise that drove her nearly mad. Until her eyes blinked open and she felt the air around her to cease the noise, expecting to hit her alarm clock.

"Now hold on sweetie, don't go moving those around too much." She heard a voice, Sniffles, and turned to find him beside her.

"Snif, sniff-" She stuttered, almost gasping for breath.

"Don't talk dear, you're in the hospital. I guess you don't remember much, after bonking your head like that. I suppose you must remember the first accident, after all, losing your hands isn't something to take lightly."

She gasped and held up her arms in shock, realizing that they were nothing but bandaged nubs. "Oh my God, oh my God. I didn't just die?"

"Thankfully no, you were rescued before you bled out. I suppose that can be considered very lucky." Sniffles flipped through a hospital chart, "but you've lost a lot of blood, you should definitely stay here for a little while, at least a day."

"But, but who rescued me?"

"He's waiting right outside. Are you sure you can handle visitors yet?"

"Please, I need to thank him." She said, barely sitting up. Sniffles nodded and motioned towards the door. She turned to find Handy walking in, carrying his helmet in his nubs as a display of modesty, and Lumpy, his usual foolish grin was actually more mild, as if he was still nervous about her condition. Petunia gave a weak, but sincere smile as they entered.

"Oh you guys, I can't thank you enough. C'mere you two," She held out her nubs and they both approached, giving them as much of a hug as she could in her current state.

Lumpy blushed, recoiling quickly, "D'aww shucks, I hardly did anything, Handy was the one who found you an' all, honest."

"Yeah," Handy blushed, " I heard the crash and came to investigate, when I saw you I went and got Lumpy and we loaded you into his wheelbarrow."

She gasped at the thought of being dropped in a filthy wheelbarrow, but overcame it to be polite, "Oh thank you, that's so sweet…"

"Yeah, I figured you'd appreciate it, even if death isn't such a big deal around here."

"Well, I do, it was a lovely gesture." She looked at her own nubs, "And maybe, since you've managed to live so well without hands, maybe I could walk a mile in your shoes per say?"

"I wouldn't mind showing you the ropes, if you wouldn't mind me teaching." Handy blushed and looked away.

"I'd love it, perhaps when I get out you could take me home and maybe, show me how to eat?"

Handy leapt at the idea, "Ruh-really? I mean, uh, if you'd like it. Heck, I've even learned to cook pretty well with these nubs." Lumpy smiled proudly at his friend, but Sniffles gave a confused look.

"That sounds lovely Handy, but, if you'll excuse me, I'm a little sleepy." She gave a sly wink in Sniffles' direction, and he took the hint.

"Yes yes, please leave her alone for now, she needs her rest!" Sniffles shooed them both out, before turning and closing the door behind him. He sat on the end of the bed, and gave her a questioning glance.

"What do you think you're doing Pet, you're with Chunky, don't you remember? This isn't like you," He rolled his eyes and sighed angrily, "Don't tell me YOU'VE got two sides too? How many of us does that make?"

"Sniffles, please, I'm just repaying his kind act. Can't you see, Handy's live his entire life being taken care of, being labeled as a "Handycap". That's why he likes building, it proves to himself he's still useful. I could just as easily die and come back with hands, but this way I'm making Handy happier than he's been in years!"

Sniffles stood and shook his head, " Petunia, he really likes you, please don't break his heart."

"I couldn't, I won't. I'm just giving him a friend, and a purpose, at least for a little while."

"Petunia," Sniffles approached the hospital room's lights, "You're a smart girl, please be careful with this though, it may seem like just a nice gesture to you, but he really thinks you love him."

"Sniffles, that's not a problem. I'd only have to worry if I loved him back." Petunia said, laying down and closing her eyes softly.

"Sometimes, I wonder." Sniffles said, switching off the lights.

* * *

OOooooooh, things are gonna get JUICY! So, just a starter, I know I have other stories to be working on, but I needed to cash in on this one in particular, for obvious reasons. And once again, anyone interested in who Chunky is, check out his starring roles in "What's Eating You" "Love Stinks" and "Family Reunion"

Ladies and Gentlemen, GOODNIGHT!


	2. Confusion

**Author's Note**

I just couldn't resist this couple, I mean the whole reason I paired Chunky with Petunia was because I didn't see anyone else that fit with her. Toothy, in my opinion, is gay, Nutty is too obsessed with candy, and Handy, well there's nothing stopping that pairing now, I suppose…

**She Nubs Me, She Nubs Me Not**

Handy's tow truck, with his new house guest in tow, slowed it pace as it approached his house, turning and pulling up the driveway, stopping to allow the automatic doors to open, and finally it drove right into the garage, stopping dead center. Petunia was surprised, to say the least.

After fumbling with the door handle, and then finally settling on pulling it open with her teeth, she stepped out and sighed, "Whoah, I still can't believe you were able to do that."

Handy, who had already somehow made his way out of the car, laughed, as he held the door open for Petunia, "It's all practice, years of practice," he lead her into the living room. It was very well kept, considering its owner had no hands. Walking into the den, Petunia was pleasantly surprised, with how clean everything was. Handy led her over to a comfy chair by the TV, and invited her to have a seat,

"It's my favorite chair, I'll start on dinner and you can just relax." Petunia blushed,

"Oh, no I couldn't. I may be a guest but I really shouldn't impose. Maybe I could help with dinner?"

"Please, I insist. Let me handle dinner tonight, I'll teach you tomorrow." He held his nubs out to the chair, and Petunia reluctantly took a seat.

"It shouldn't take long, Pasta's okay right?" Handy said, as he headed into the kitchen.

"Yes, that'd be lovely." And then she was alone. Though not really, the kitchen had no door, he was still within earshot. She decided to make herself comfortable, and laid back into the chair, resting her nubs on the armrests. She felt something rough, and noticed the left armrest had a remote control embedded in it. She felt the other, and found a small button. With a click, a TV tray unfolded in front of her.

"Wow, he really has quite a set up." She whispered, and tapped the controller with her nub. The TV flickered on, and she attempted to change the channel, but even with the oversized buttons, her unskilled nubs mashed against the controller, ending up on a random channel. It was some sappy movie, from the 50's. A Fox was sitting in a wheelchair, she seemed young, but had a deep sadness in her eyes. A cat, an actor Petunia had seen in many big productions, stood near her, crouching to meet her eye level.

"_I just don't feel like there's anyway I can keep living. I coulda been in pictures, my name up in lights, and now it's all over!" _She said, drying her tears with her sleeve.

"_Flurry, you can't give up hope on me. I know your pain. That car crash, the one that killed my parents when I was only eight, left me paralyzed for five years. You can't give up yet."_

"_I-I'm not as strong as you! I can't make it."_

"_It doesn't matter how strong you are, you're not alone, not while I'm here!" _He embraced her passionately and abruptly, shocking the girl. But she soon broke into tears, and returned the embrace.

"_You'll always be there, won't you?"_

"_Of course I will, I'll always be there to protect you."_

Petunia reached to dry her tears, but remembered that she had no hands, and groaned while staring angrily at her nubs. She went to change the channel, when something hit her.

"Oh my God, this is exactly what I'm making Handy, believe, isn't it?" She brought her nubs up to her mouth, shocked. "He thinks he's going to be taking care of me, forever…" She trailed off, afraid of her own imagination. Though, in all honesty it was far from a terrible fate, she shouldn't be, no, _couldn't _pretend to be in love with him. It was so wrong, all so very wrong.

"No, I'm just being paranoid, he's being friendly and all. Just friends, we're just friends…"

…

A flick of his nub, and the radio sprang to life, playing a lighthearted tune. Handy skipped back and forth as he reached into the cupboard, grabbing a box of Pasta with his teeth. The pot of water was already boiling, and he bit down on the box, causing the spaghetti to spill out. He grabbed a wooden spoon between his two nubs and stirred a pot of sauce he had set up, singing off key to the song on the radio.

"Hey! I'm gone today, but I'll be back around someday! It seems like everywhere I go, the more I see the l know. But I know, one thing, that I love you!"

He hopped over to the counter, grabbing a package of ground beef. He skillfully separated it, rolled the pieces across the countertop to shape them into balls. And then he grabbed his spoon and lined it up against a meatball as if he was a pool shark. With a steady aim he snapped the spoon outward and the meatballs began rolling to and fro across the counter, bouncing off each other until they were all in a straight line, rolling towards him. He held his shoulders out like a platform, and they rolled onto one nub, across his back and off another, landing in the saucepot across the kitchen. He smiled and went back to the stirring, whistling.

"Oh man, this is the greatest day of my life, Petunia's here, and I'm making her dinner!" He sighed contently. "Man, who knows how long she'll be here, maybe weeks." But he suddenly snapped back into reality.

"Oh, but Chunky's going to be back soon. And either way, Petunia's not that kind of girl." He sighed, and continued stirring the pasta. "Oh, but what was I thinking? Helping Petunia just to get with her? I'm such a jerk."

A bird began to tweet with the music, and he turned to find a parakeet sitting on his window sill. He left the pasta for a second, and went to pet the bird.

"Aw, well aren't you cute?" The bird flew off and the window slammed shut, thankfully Handy had nothing to lose, and gave a sigh of relief. "Phew, that could have been messy." And with that he went back to preparing dinner.

…

Petunia had dozed off laying in the chair, and was sleeping soundly until

_Ratatatataatatatata!_

Her eyes snapped open with the sounds of gunshots. Panting, and sweating from the shock she saw the TV, the movie was still on, but showed a very different scene. The fox was kneeling over the cat, his body full of holes. He was bleeding heavily and she was crying, he had probably died in her arms. The wheelchair lay nearby, the girl must have been thrown from it. A figure, a Deer dressed in a fine suit, held a Tommy gun, still smoking. The Deer pulled his cigar from his mouth to speak

"_Ya bitch, you think you can run around without me, while I'm outta town??" _The girl pulled her head up and spoke between her sobbing,

"_He was there for me, not like you!" _The deer raised his gun at her, and she ducked down.

"_Nobody plays Don Rhyme!" _The gun flared and blood splattered across his face. Petunia shrieked and slapped the remote, turning off the TV before she could see anything else. She was terrified, but was even more shocked when she heard a voice behind her, but it was only Handy, standing in the doorway.

"Petunia, are you alright?"

"Oh, oh my, yes I'm fine. It was just a scary movie. Um is.." She trailed off, panting a little.

"Actually, I just finished the spaghetti, if you're still hungry. I set us up a table on the deck outside."

"You have a deck?" Petunia said, hopping off the chair.

"Yeah, I, uh, built it. Do you want to eat inside instead, I mean it wouldn't be-"

"What? I'd love to eat outside, it sounds absolutely wonderful." And so Handy led her outside to a finely built wooden deck, brought her to a small table with chairs on either side, and pulled out her chair with his nubs. She blushed a little and sat down, as Handy struck a match he held in his teeth and used it to light a few lanterns around them. Petunia noticed the lights around her,

"Oh wow, a candlelight dinner, how.."

"Romantic?" Handy's eyes widended

"Actually I was thinking sweet."

"Oh, yeah, right, just sweet." He sat down with her, and held a fork between his nubs, scooping spaghetti onto Petunia's plate, then his own. Handy began eating, but his friend was having a little more than some difficulty. Finally she knocked her fork to the ground in frustration.

"Problem, Petunia?" Handy asked, his mouth half full with Spaghetti.

"Just having some trouble, you know, holding things."

"Let me help," He said, taking a fork full of pasta, and brings it to her face.

"Okay, are you seriously feeding me?"

"Petunia, please, just let me help."

"Fine," She opened up and he put the fork in her mouth. She bit down and he went back to eat his own food, not realizing he still had a piece of pasta on his fork, leading straight to Petunia's mouth. He stuffed the food in his mouth, sucking on a loose strand of spaghetti in his mouth.

"_My God," _Petunia thought, chewing the food her friend had just fed her, _"this is pathetic, I'm being fed like a child. I suppose I'll just have to swallow my pride for now."_

Handy, meanwhile, was wondering why this one piece of pasta went on for so long. Finally, he pulled his head back, and yanked Petunia forward over the table. She landed on him, their lips colliding. They stared into each other's eyes for a second, before Petunia pulled herself off, blushing. She was covered in sauce, and above all was sweating and blushing. Handy was deadly embarrassed.

"Petunia, I'm sorry, I just" Petunia cut him off,

"I need a shower, please." She stood horrified at her own appearance more than anything, her OCD taking over.

"Oh, of course, down the hall, on your right." She walked away, with a hurried pace,

"Petunia, do you need any help with,"

"NO!" She shrieked, and his heart skipped a beat. He just sat there, covered in sauce himself, but more petrified with how angry Petunia must be. Finally, he screamed and pounded his fists over and over again into his helmet.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid!!!!"

…

Petunia stood there, in the stream of hot water, hardly moving, just leaning against the linoleum wall behind her. She saw the movie again in her mind, but instead of the fox girl and the cat that cared for her lying dead, a beaver and a koala were sprawled out in a pool of their own blood, a huge gash in the left part of their chest. And standing above them was a skunk, a knife clenched in her hand.

"_I thought I knew who I loved…"_

* * *

Okay, sorry, this chapter was started two days ago, but HTF released a Puzzle game, "On Thin Ice" and I got addicted to it, beat every level. And hey, Deadliving, try and make it to level 19, you'll laugh.

Oh, and Flurry, Frost (Jerryassmonkey) and Rhyme (Meowth's Toon Dragon) made a cameo in this chapter, like Caramel(Kitten630) did in the last chapter. And in case you're wondering, these character's owners did not ask me to be in the story. Hell, I didn't even ask them. I just thought it would be nice to throw in subtle hints to other's OCs. So don't ask, if the opportunity arises, I might include your character.

Also, sorry for the shameless plug, but if you haven't checked out my latest story "One World", make sure to check it out. It's not strictly a HTF story, but Flippy and Flaky are major characters.

So there, shameless plug. Good bye friends!


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